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Wednesday 18 January 2012

Autosport.... The Jho Experience

Its time to get ready for goody bags galore and the first opportunity to mingle and abuse the credit card. All roads lead to Birmingham, as its time for the Autosport show....

Now the more eagle eyed reader will remember that last year, I missed the show due to the Young Farmers Cabaret I was producing. Well this year it was a pantomime, and as writer, audio and lighting engineer, combined with co-producing and seeing it from inception, my presence was necessary there. Ok says I, I'll do the competition on the Sat and try and get to Brum for either the press day or the Sunday... Then Probus YFC drop out meaning Saturday is now free again. Result! However, my wagon, the beloved El Skodage, was suffering from a spot of arthritis, so it was time to move it on to pastures new. Now out with the Fabia, and in with the Golf.... and lo, the perfect excuse to give her a blast up the motorway. Oh and see the missus of course!

So arrving at the NEC just after 10am, the north car parks were full and it was white as a sheet, the veritable comparitable equitorial climes of Cornwall meaning an early ice scrape wasn't required. So I meet up with girlfriend Sharon, and like a game of Autosport Monopoly, go straight to Brisca stand, do not pass the hotpanted strumpet, and do not collect a goody bag from a gromit manafacturer.

Once again the Oval Racing Experience was certainly dominated by the Formula 2 brigade, and with a slightly different location this year for Paul Brown and his hardworking staff (although employing Carlton's kids to do the bag stuffing is practically slave labour) With Celtic Fiscal prudence aside, with the Ben Fund and Barford having a part of the stand and with a large presence (as usual) of Randall Clones (with identical sign jobs, paint finishes, they all just look the same in my eyes), it was clear that F2 was the word on the street.

So to the live stage, and with a near deafening creschendo of Orff's O Fortuna (or the Old Spice music, depending on your schooling) signalled the arrival of "The Impact Dancers", 3 dancing girls with whips and a bacofoil fetish. And then the housewife's favourite Nick Knowles, appears on stage. Oh, not the DIY SOS gruffster, but ah the ah voice ah of ah Spedeworth ah Nick ah Knowles ah. With the interviews being conducted by the afore mentioned Knowles and the Clarkson-esque Jacket and Jeans combo of Lively Linfield, it looked slick. Even if Novice of the Year Jack Aldridge (921) was a little mic shy, or maybe a little shy at the bevvy of beautys that was parading around.

Karen and April..... nutters
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Something Bradderz has yet to get his hands on.... and the World Final Trophy too..

 With Brisca Babes, Karen, April, Ashleigh and Gemma adding a touch of glamour to proceedings, and with their ability to hand out goody bags to all and sundry. When asked by a passer by what was in the goody by, April retorted that she didn't know, and she was the beauty and not the brains!
Ashleigh is of course parts of the Racing Dolls, who attend numerous events up in Scotland, especially the cruise scene. She also has quite a nice tat of a mini on her back. They have calendars available, reasonably priced, and I expect a freebie in the post lol.



 But enough of the fast women what about the cars. Well there were plenty to stand aghast at. 2 new for World Champ Mark Simpson (871), including a self built shale car. Chris Mitchell (219) and Kelvin Whalley (101) with new motors and Jay Tompkins (290) going over to the Motorworld dark side


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Wing with Gold... hmmm Omen....

First up, was the returning wind up merchant, David Polley (38) who proclaimed on the Barford Microphone, that everyone who wins the world final jumps the start, and that he disliked the tractors and was bored with hotrods. If nothing else, post race interviews should be worth a listen this season! Speaking of jump starts - did any one notice the natty Pringle numbers that Cyril, Charlie and the Vicar were wearing.....

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Super Hooper's Super Duper Trophy Scooper



Then, from the People's Republic of Cornwall, came the new Motorworld of Neil Hooper(676), now resplondent in purple, courtesy of main sponsor Neil Truran(306), who was originally to pilot it, and purple is his trademark colour, just like Autospeed!








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But the car that had everyone talking was the 886 one. Radically different from its peers and turning a few heads.... in the Heritage class...  you thought I talking about the Bradbury car... coming to that. So yes Bradders finally left the comfortable Cornish car construction cubby hole of Lord Higman of Menheniot, and headed off to see Uncle Terry, him off of Elite, under his new guise as Spedeworth Fabrications. So with Bradderz new Eliteworth (as it was part built before the takeover) as the probable star car of the show.
Complete with inboard suspension front and back, supplied by Linfield Engineering, which looked the dogs danglies. It certainly has turned heads, especially amongst fellow car builders.
Now to the indoor arena... and F1's decided to take their toys away, a woeful 2 cars for their regional formula which they profess to be "Premier", all because they didn't get to play. The profile of the 2's was only heightened by being on every show, with the England vs Scotland Auld enemy sort out, albeit staged, proving the competitiveness of the sport. The main show had the comedic virtues of Dave Richardson, the one who talks out of his RCE, not the one behind RCE, along with new stooge, biker girl Amy, who looked thoroughly uninterested in the formulas on show or indeed the faux advances of Dave. Still a show it was, and alongside the 2's were the Hot Rods which were struggling to grip. Dear old Kewsy (174), who often reads this, slid into the wall and the sound of a wallet being opened. Still alongside the Autograss, which looked uncomfortable on the unfamilar surface. Proof if needed, that as soon as you get on a motorbike, you have a frontal labotomy, was the X Stunt biker chaps. Nutters. And then the lovely tale of Race to Recovery who have appeared on Top Gear. The lads from the forces who lost limbs, racing Landys cross country. Built by the guys at QT at Estover, Plymouth, these guys also build former National Champion Chris Cuming's competition landrover.

So we ascend to our car park, via getting lost in the freezing conditions that greeted us on our exit from the hall. Eventually, I take the shorter option of the 30 mins up to Nottingham, as the show left me exhausted.

Just proves, with all the hype that follows some formulae, Brisca F2 can put on a good show!






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