Skegvegas Speedweekend.....

Tents packed up, barbeque coals smouldering, enough empty glass to build the Crystal Palace and various flags draped over various free standing objects. Rumour is Hazel is weighing in all that tin or the empties to pay for the grandstand for the F1 world! All roads lead out of Skegvegas after another Speedweekend jamboree of banter, alcohol and funny costumes. Apparently there was some racing too!

For some the racing started on the Thursday night, under a monsoon, which saw some happy campers camping in the middle of Lake Cottage Farm, as Skeggy took a drenching, unlike our man in the North dear old Wrighty, who looked like the outboard over the car was a better option. Ever the opportunist, F1's favourite double glazing salesman, Paul Hines (259) said that if anyone had suffered damage from the humungous hail shower, that he offers replacement glass at reasonable rates! Well that new tar car gotta pay for itself somehow...

Now due to prom based logistical problems, I was only able to do the Sunday, and it felt a little lacking in atmosphere, but then everyone knows its the Saturday which is the shizzle. General consensus was that it was missing something...

3 straight heats greeted the Sunday goers, after the other heats from the previous last night. Heat 1 saw yellow flag collector Gary Wrench (359) take fellow white top, Jacklyn Ellis (915) for company. Wrench took the victory, however for the lady got it all wrong going down the back straight, resulting in major damage, and as the rescuing marshalls said she had a "hot ass". Sadly for Jac, it wasn't a compliment as the flames licking around her seat caused an extinguishing moment. Heat 2 saw the immaculate car of Andrew Thompson (717) took heat 2, which acted as heat 7 for the UK Championship. Keeping up at the back?? Good, stay with us!

Needing a lot of points to get himself back into the UK final to defend his title, Gordon Moodie (7) took heat 3 or was it 8?? When he got on the pace wagon, the Red Arrows (possible flying in formation ready for the RAF Waddington Air Show) flew past. A spokesman for Skegness Stadium said it wasn't a coincidence!

The last chance was won by fellow Scot Chris Burgoyne (647) who probably wouldn't of had to last chance if his wheelguard didn't come adrift during the earlier heat. After being shown the pointless technical disqualification flag numerous times, the canny Scot probably thought the St George's Cross was a bit of provocation from Mr Starter, and promptly ignored it constantly, until the black flag (the correct and only flag that should be used) was shown.

However if this weekend is to grow further and back to the "glory days", a few things need be addressed....

The "UK Open"

Just how "Open" a UK Open can be with a restricted amount of bookings. Surely thats a closed championship? Yes, it's not a Brisca title but a domestic title added onto the weekend. What are the criteria for selection? It seemed a little top heavy and aimed towards more blues and reds. Surely it would have been better to offer a booking to whoever wanted one....which brings me on to...

F1's presence

They were on the whole dull. Plenty of bumper trading at the back but the winners sped into the lead and weren't seen again. A potential 40 pit spaces were taken up - lets face it, by the number of cars there, justification for their attendance was hard to fathom, considering they have their own Speedweekend in May.

Format

In what has to be one of the most confusing formats, drivers raced in 2 out of the 5 heats on the Saturday, then some drivers then raced in the consolation despite scoring points.  Then a meeting final which counted for nothing with regard to the UK Championship race. Then the qualifying point scoring starts

Not only is it confusing on a national points front, it is confusing for the spectator too. Despite the best efforts of Messrs Oxby and Kaleta, keeping track of who done what is hard at best, including many confused looks.

The proposal I've had for ages, rather than have races for no points for most of the drivers, is to split the drivers into two groups, if 90 cars into two groups of 45. Group Alpha and Group Beta, and never the twain shall meet until the later stages. Each group then has 2 heats, and consolation, 10 going through from each, giving a 30 car "semi final". Top fifteen go through from the semi, the remainder going to the "B final" where the 15 non qualifiers from each semi battle it out for the 10 remaining places, in the closed grid Super Final, which would have triple or quadruple national points. Easy to follow and no more races, and an equal distribution and reward of points for efforts.

For those who say, it's not about the racing, then go to the Boathouse, and we'll see you Sunday evening!

Starts...

As Brisca's unofficial watcher of starts, being Secretary of the Benevolent Order of the Pringle, I take a great interest in the fairness of starts. The starts on the Saturday were the source of much heightened blood pressure for one stock car fan, as the future Mrs Goldin launched a twitter outrage! So with this in mind, I took my notes marked "Bristol" (sorry Andy!) of poor starts. The whites got flyers and the reds were in the blues before the green. Drew Lammas (341) was definitely once bitten and twice shy as he led away the UK Open, having a final nicked off him on the line on the Saturday night, so he crept around like a funeral cortege. Roll on to the GN, and Moodie and Goldin are 5th and 6th when the yellows come out. Now one of the memories of last season at Skegness was Eddie Darby passing 5 cars in one corner the hard way. However, this isn't meant to happen whilst the yellow is out and the green is still behind Mr Starter! Even to most practitioners of the Moodie faith, said it was dubious at best, extremely advantageous! Another track, another steward with more minerals, and we'd have some silver in the Pringle order.

So, in conclusion, I can't really comment about the weekend as a whole, as the apres-stox and night life of the Friday and Saturday nights, and Sunday is the day when everyone slopes off one by one and heads home, be it Scotland, Ireland or Pixieland, when everyone nurses a hangover or nurses a week of van fatigue!

Right, you lot, time you lot come down to Cornwall innit...  St Day Qualifier and then Toytown, you know you wants to!